Sept 21 Week

It is Sunday, Sept 21 and I had a great night sleep. I was exhausted from my excursion the day before. Plus, I had a manhatten and a vicodan left over from a sprained ankle. Sleep of the dead. Peg and I went to mass and then to Trader Horn where I found a food mill. I should have gone there first. This store ranks right up there with Tractor Supply. Another favorite. We came home and prepared to watch the Steeler game. The Steelers played the Eagles and lost 15-6. No offense again. Beginning to think Joe Walton came back as offensive coordinator. When he was the coach, the signs in the stadium would say " Hey J E where's the O?" Hope you get my drift.

Anyway, a good game to have a couple of cocktails. I had my travel catheter bag on my leg since I had been out and about. First drink, I could almost see that bag fill up. Remember, it was warm and I was wearing shorts. Dumped the bag. Half hour later, had to dump the bag. One of my classic post surg line was at that point when I told Peg it was hell once you break the bubble. I decided to have another cocktail, but I put my overnight bag on first. Hah, I was good for 6 hours anyway.

Tuesday was the day I was getting my catheter removed. If you remember as a child how you felt on Christmas Eve, you have about one half the sense of excitement I had at finally getting that thing out.

Tuesday morning at 8 am, Peg took me to the docs. I didnt see him but his nurse was going to pull the catheter. I had taken my pads with me so that I could put them on right away. Well, I went into the room with Peg and laid on the table. The nurse took a syringe and drained the fluid from the catheter which held it in my bladder. Then she said the best thing for me to do was take a deep breath. I didnt like the sound of that but I obliged. She gave a yank, and that breath came out like a tornado. I saw all white and dont believe I have ever felt pain like that in my life. Peg was sitting by my feet and I kept curling my toes as the only response to the pain. The nurse said it was out, but I am not sure if she meant the catheter or my spine. I put my diaper on and we left. I was not to see the doc until Nov. 6. On the way home, me in the passenger seat, I couldnt hold back the tears. For the first time, I just gave in. I allowed myself that morning to wallow, but that was about it, although Peg may argue. Between the pain from the catheter irritation, the removal, and the incision, I just had had enough. I also learned quickly that Depends Man Guards do not work with boxer briefs. It was a trip to Wally World to get 8 pairs of tighty whiteys. At least now without the catheter, I was allowed to drive. I didnt really care about driving but I did want to get on my tractor and cut the grass. The problem was that I could not lift more than 10 pounds, so I had to figure out how to empty the bags. I just pulled handfulls of grass out until they were light enough for me to pick up. Anyway, humility aside for the sake of literature, my first stop to empty the bags, I had to pee. I already knew that once I felt that, I had about 10 seconds to get to the toilet. I am on my tractor about 150 feet from the house and there ain't no way. I jumped off the tractor and was going to try to get home. Then I thought "fuck it", put my hand on the hood of the tractor, and used that diaper for what it was designed for. It was great.

The day after my catheter came out, I got up and started my morning in the bathroom. All I could manage was a very slow drip. I became concerned fearing that the bag was going back on. I dribbled all morning and was becoming upset and frustrated. I called the docs office on Thursday and the told me to come right over. They asked me to go in a cup which they check for an infection, which came back negative. Then the did a sonagram on my bladder to see if I was not emptying completely. No infection and I did drain the weasel. They called the doc and he said for me to go home and do Kegel exercises. Now, Peg and I do Kegels. I am not explaining them if you dont know what they are, that is what Google is for.